__In a culture that so easily glorifies romantic love over all others, it can be easy to over look one of the greatest gifts of all: friendship.__True friendship transforms us as we journey through the ordinary and the extraordinary moments of life together. And friendship with Jesus is no exception – indeed, it is the greatest invitation into a relationship that sees us forever changed for the better.

When Jesus walked the earth, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus were some of his closest friends. He loved them just as they were but equally empowered them to become so much more. Here, Amy Boucher Pye unpacks the dynamics of this remarkable friendship, inviting you to be transformed by the same love that shaped their lives.

Wherever you are on your life's journey, let yourself experience grounded faith, boundless joy, and profound peace through an ever-deepening friendship with Jesus.

Amy Boucher Pye provides new insights on how friendship with God has the power to change everything

'What a beautiful, deep dive into knowing Jesus. Amy takes time not only to consider multiple, thoughtful aspects of the relationships between Mary, Martha and Lazarus, she also helps us to apply the living truth of God's Word to our own friendship with him. This is a practical, scriptural work that will encourage, challenge and inspire.'

'Amy Boucher Pye's gentle tone welcomes readers into a safe space to encounter God's healing grace in Transforming Love: How Friendship with Jesus Changes Us. With a beautiful balance of deep Bible study, trusted prayer practices, practical applications and intimate relatable testimonies, Amy offers a fresh perspective on the familiar story of three siblings - Martha, Mary and Lazarus - who experienced life-changing relationships with Jesus. Whether you've enjoyed healthy lifelong friendships, struggled with establishing lasting friendships, or are simply hoping to be a better friend, Transforming Love points to the source of "liquid love" who can enrich our earthly relationships by deepening our relationship with him - Jesus!'

'Transforming Love offers a fresh and compelling exploration of the relationships between Jesus, Mary and Martha. Amy combines profound spiritual insights with practical guidance and beautiful writing, drawing upon the wisdom of the Church Fathers. The book includes rich examples of how Psalm 23 applies to each scene and significant reflection questions for a group setting. It is a thought-provoking and inspiring resource for anyone yearning for a life transformed by Jesus's love.'

'Reading Transforming Love is both a rewarding and an immersive experience. Amy takes the biblical themes of faith and friendship and welcomes us into the story, so that we can truly appreciate the transforming potential of deeply rooted relationships with God and others. Grab your journal, find your favourite chair, and prepare your heart and mind for this enriching journey into the Gospels.'

'Diving deep into the friendships with Jesus enjoyed by the sibling group of Mary, Martha and Lazarus revolutionizes our understanding of the friendship we, too, can have with him! Here is a well-researched and honest look at the first-century relationships that speaks to us today. Thank you, Amy, for your glorious work!'

'For many years, I have been fascinated by the relationship between Jesus, Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Their stories, their interactions, their honesty and their silence help me to trust in both Jesus and in the Word, because, in them, I find reality. Their family dance is like mine. Grief hurts, hospitality matters and each member of the family has a powerful role to play, yet sometimes this causes conflict which must be addressed. I understand and relate to this! Transforming Love prayerfully and pastorally navigates this family dynamic. Amy, too, bravely and humbly uses her own experiences to share some deep insights into human flourishing with passion and joy. She then encourages you, draws you into a deeper relationship with God, as much of St John's Gospel itself is designed to do. This is a refreshing book, where, in a grieving and hurting world, the thought of being "loved back to life" is deeply wonderful.'

'I have increasingly recognized the importance of godly, Christ-centred friendships. Amy gives us a framework for considering our relationships with Christ and others through the lens of the life of Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Her words are practical, stirring and wise.'

Foreword xi  
Introduction: Friends of Jesus 1  
Part 1  
Being and Doing: The Luke 10 Story  
Chapter 1: So Distracted 9  
Chapter 2: Listening and Learning 21  
Chapter 3: Both . . . And 31  
Part 2  
Grieving and Rejoicing: The John 11 Story  
Chapter 4: Waiting for Jesus 45  
Chapter 5: Aftermath 59  
Chapter 6: At the Tomb 71  
Part 3  
Loving and Serving: The John 12 Story  
Chapter 7: The Party 83  
Chapter 8: Liquid Love 95  
Final Words: The Encounter that Changes Us 105  
Acknowledgements 107  
Leader's Guide 109  
Notes 117

Amy Boucher Pye

Introduction: Friends of Jesus

Part 1: Being and Doing: The Luke 10 Story

Chapter 1: So Distracted

Chapter 2: Listening and Learning

Chapter 3: Both . . . And

Part 2: Grieving and Rejoicing: The John 11 Story

Chapter 4: Waiting for Jesus

Chapter 5: Aftermath

Chapter 6: At the Tomb

Part 3: Loving and Serving: The John 12 Story

Chapter 7: The Party

Chapter 8: Liquid Love

Final Words: The Encounter That Changes Us

Acknowledgements

Leader’s Guide

Notes

In a culture that so easily glorifies romantic love over all others, it can be easy to over look one of the greatest gifts of all: friendship.   
  
True friendship transforms us as we journey through the ordinary and the extraordinary moments of life together. And friendship with Jesus is no exception – indeed, it is the greatest invitation into a relationship that sees us forever changed for the better.   
  
When Jesus walked the earth, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus were some of his closest friends. He loved them just as they were but equally empowered them to become so much more. Here, Amy Boucher Pye unpacks the dynamics of this remarkable friendship, inviting you to be transformed by the same love that shaped their lives.   
  
Wherever you are on your life’s journey, let yourself experience grounded faith, boundless joy, and profound peace through an ever-deepening friendship with Jesus.

\["Want to grow closer to Christ?","Amy Boucher Pye explores how deep friendship with Jesus changes you","A powerful read that takes you on a journey of faith and love"\]

'What a beautiful, deep dive into knowing Jesus. Amy takes time not only to consider multiple, thoughtful aspects of the relationships between Mary, Martha and Lazarus, she also helps us to apply the living truth of God's Word to our own friendship with him. This is a practical, scriptural work that will encourage, challenge and inspire.'

__- Dr James Banks, author of Prayers for Prodigals and Praying the Prayers of the Bible__

'Amy Boucher Pye's gentle tone welcomes readers into a safe space to encounter God's healing grace in Transforming Love: How Friendship with Jesus Changes Us. With a beautiful balance of deep Bible study, trusted prayer practices, practical applications and intimate relatable testimonies, Amy offers a fresh perspective on the familiar story of three siblings - Martha, Mary and Lazarus - who experienced life-changing relationships with Jesus. Whether you've enjoyed healthy lifelong friendships, struggled with establishing lasting friendships, or are simply hoping to be a better friend, Transforming Love points to the source of "liquid love" who can enrich our earthly relationships by deepening our relationship with him - Jesus!'

__- Xochitl Dixon, Our Daily Bread writer and author of Different Like Me and Waiting for God__

'Transforming Love offers a fresh and compelling exploration of the relationships between Jesus, Mary and Martha. Amy combines profound spiritual insights with practical guidance and beautiful writing, drawing upon the wisdom of the Church Fathers. The book includes rich examples of how Psalm 23 applies to each scene and significant reflection questions for a group setting. It is a thought-provoking and inspiring resource for anyone yearning for a life transformed by Jesus's love.'

__- Jennifer Huff, her.BIBLE__

'Reading Transforming Love is both a rewarding and an immersive experience. Amy takes the biblical themes of faith and friendship and welcomes us into the story, so that we can truly appreciate the transforming potential of deeply rooted relationships with God and others. Grab your journal, find your favourite chair, and prepare your heart and mind for this enriching journey into the Gospels.'

__- Cathy Madavan, writer, speaker, broadcaster and author of Irrepressible and Why Less Means More__

'Diving deep into the friendships with Jesus enjoyed by the sibling group of Mary, Martha and Lazarus revolutionizes our understanding of the friendship we, too, can have with him! Here is a well-researched and honest look at the first-century relationships that speaks to us today. Thank you, Amy, for your glorious work!'

__- Elisa Morgan, speaker, author and co-host of Discover the Word__

'For many years, I have been fascinated by the relationship between Jesus, Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Their stories, their interactions, their honesty and their silence help me to trust in both Jesus and in the Word, because, in them, I find reality. Their family dance is like mine. Grief hurts, hospitality matters and each member of the family has a powerful role to play, yet sometimes this causes conflict which must be addressed. I understand and relate to this! Transforming Love prayerfully and pastorally navigates this family dynamic. Amy, too, bravely and humbly uses her own experiences to share some deep insights into human flourishing with passion and joy. She then encourages you, draws you into a deeper relationship with God, as much of St John's Gospel itself is designed to do. This is a refreshing book, where, in a grieving and hurting world, the thought of being "loved back to life" is deeply wonderful.'

__- The Rt Revd Rob Wickham, Bishop of Edmonton__

'I have increasingly recognized the importance of godly, Christ-centred friendships. Amy gives us a framework for considering our relationships with Christ and others through the lens of the life of Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Her words are practical, stirring and wise.'

__- Sarah Yardley, Mission Lead, Creation Fest UK__

Transforming Love by Amy Boucher Pye helps Christians understand and experience God's love, transforming their perspective, joy, and obedience.

__Amy Boucher Pye__ is an author, speaker, retreat leader and spiritual director. She writes for Our Daily Bread and other devotional publications, with over a thousand articles published. She's the author of six books, including 7 Ways to Pray (Form, 2021) and the award-winning Finding Myself in Britain (Authentic Media, 2015), She loved earning her master's degree in Christian spirituality through Heythrop College, University of London (2017) and enjoys her work as a spiritual director. She lives with her husband and their two teenagers in their spacious but drafty vicarage in North London. Find her at amyboucherpye.com

Vicki Cottingham

When I heard that Amy Boucher Pye had written a book on these siblings, “Transforming Love: How friendship with Jesus changes us” I knew this was a book I wanted to read. I believe we were created for a relationship with God and with one another and this is the focus of Amy’s book, using the examples of Jesus’ friendship with the three siblings. In today’s world we may be more connected than ever before through technology, yet many feel lonelier than ever before. We may have any number of “friends” on Facebook, but we may also lack those deep, intimate relationships which we were made for. I believe Amy’s book addresses this by showing us what it really means to be friends with Jesus and friends with one another. The book is separated in three parts, with each part concentrating on a particular scripture: Luke 10, John 11 and John 12. Each chapter begins with Amy sharing about one of her experiences in life which leads nicely into the topic for that particular chapter. I’m always interested in the lives of others, and enjoyed this aspect of Amy’s writing. Amy then goes on to unpack scripture, teach its truth and shows how it is relevant for today. I chose to read just one chapter per sitting. This gave me time to read slowly, to think on the points Amy made and to also learn about and try out the prayer practice included at the end of each chapter. Her questions at the end of each chapter helped me to think further on the information and apply it personally. The prayer practice I found most useful in my current situation was the one which focused on learning to lament. The process of how to do this was very clearly written and I was really helped by it. I was blessed by praying in this way, speaking honestly with God about my situation and how I was feeling. When we experience God as our friend and relate to him as such, he will help us to relate to others in the same way. Whatever stage you are at in your relationship with God, whether you know him yet as friend, or not, I believe this book, if you will allow it, will help you to draw closer to God. And as you draw close to God, he promises to draw close to you.

Real friendship with God

Transforming Love

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