__Gary Thomas__ is writer-in-residence at Second Baptist Church in Houston, a frequent guest on Focus on the Family and FamilyLife Today radio, and a popular speaker around the world. His award-winning books have been translated into fifteen languages and have sold two million copies. Thomas and his wife have three children.  
  
__Steve D. Wilke, PhD,__ has been engaged in psychological ministries for over thirty years. Following his doctoral work in clinical psychology with a specialization in marriage and family, he founded the Family Counseling Center, where he serves as clinical director. He cofounded LEADon®, a leadership development firm that equips executives, leaders, and their teams with strategic leadership skill sets. Steve has been married to Rebecca for almost forty years. Together they have authored numerous books, but they feel their greatest legacy is their family, now comprised of adult children and grandchildren.  
  
__Rebecca Wilke, EdD__ has served as a teacher, professor, and leadership consultant working with children and adults in both public and private school settings. She is a graduate of the University of Southern California, where she received her doctorate in educational leadership. Rebecca is a cofounder of Sonkist Ministries, a faith-based ministry that supports individuals, couples, and families. She is a principal and cofounder of LEADon®.

__In his popular book, 9 Essential Conversations before You Say I Do, author and pastor Gary Thomas, marriage and family therapist Dr. Steve Wilke and Rebecca Wilke, EdD help couples explore:__- What marriage means to each individual and whether this is a wise match
- How to engage in essential relational pursuits such as healthy conflict, sexual intimacy, and spiritual intimacy
- How to discuss in advance crucial aspects of marriage such as childrearing, finances, and marital roles
- Why asking hard questions now is better than asking them five years from now

   
 With thoughtful questions that encourage couples to examine themselves and their relationships, 9 Essential Conversations before You Say I Do will help couples thrive not only in the early months of their marriage but also in the years to come.  
   
 Includes Guides and Questions.

"Gary Thomas debunks the mythical search for a soul mate to help you choose a 'sole-mate'—someone who will lay down their life in faithful love. This biblically based book is for anyone who wants to be wise in their pursuit of a spouse."

"Filled with questions to make you think and teaching that will bring 'aha' moments, this book is a must read for everyone considering marriage. I highly recommend it to you—I wish I'd had it when I was single!"

"Gary Thomas dismantles contemporary philosophies on love, sexuality, and marital union by offering strong arguments for why they have not been successful. His appeal to a kingdom-first perspective gives both hope and healing for a generation in desperate need of a fresh and Christ-centered understanding of God's plan for marriage. This book is a must-read before anyone says 'I do.'"

__A workbook for premarital counseling, 9 Essential Conversations before You Say I Do guides couples through the most important conversations to test and grow their relationship.__

Contents  
 Authors' Note 7  
 For Pastors and Mentors 9  
 For Couples: How to Use This Conversation Guide 13  
 Session 1: Pre-engagement Punch List 19  
 Devotional 1: Six Signs He or She Isn't Marriage Material 25  
 Session 2: The Doubt-Free Wedding Day 31  
 Devotional 2: Two Are Better Than One 40  
 Session 3: Your Covenant Marriage 43  
 Devotional 3: Divorce Divorce 52  
 Session 4: And the Two Shall Become One 57  
 Devotional 4: Moving Toward Each Other 64  
 Session 5: Building a Family 67  
 Devotional 5: Some Day 74  
 Session 6: Constructive Conflict 77  
 Devotional 6: Vacation Vanity 86  
 Session 7: Developing and Maintaining Sexual Intimacy 91  
 Devotional 7: The Power of a Pure Passion 100  
 Session 8: Money, Money, Money 105  
 Devotional 8: Finances 112  
 Session 9: Spiritual Intimacy 115  
 Devotional 9: Power Couples 120  
 Appendix A: The Marriage Mentor's  
 Conversational Session Guide 123  
 Appendix B: Personal History Questionnaire 137  
 Notes 157

Gary Thomas;Steve Wilke;Rebecca Wilke

Authors’ Note

For Pastors and Mentors

For Couples: How to Use This Conversation Guide

Session 1: Pre-engagement Punch List

Devotional 1: Six Signs He or She Isn't Marriage Material

Session 2: The Doubt-Free Wedding Day

Devotional 2: Two Are Better Than One

Session 3: Your Covenant Marriage

Devotional 3: Divorce Divorce

Session 4: And the Two Shall Become One

Devotional 4: Moving Toward Each Other

Session 5: Building a Family

Devotional 5: Some Day

Session 6: Constructive Conflict

Devotional 6: Vacation Vanity

Session 7: Developing and Maintaining Sexual Intimacy

Devotional 7: The Power of a Pure Passion

Session 8: Money, Money, Money

Devotional 8: Finances

Session 9: Spiritual Intimacy

Devotional 9: Power Couples

Appendix A: The Marriage Mentor’s Conversational Session Guide

Appendix B: Personal History Questionnaire

Notes

In his popular book, 9 Essential Conversations before You Say I Do, author and pastor Gary Thomas, marriage and family therapist Dr. Steve Wilke and Rebecca Wilke, EdD help couples explore:

- What marriage means to each individual and whether this is a wise match
- How to engage in essential relational pursuits such as healthy conflict, sexual intimacy, and spiritual intimacy
- How to discuss in advance crucial aspects of marriage such as childrearing, finances, and marital roles
- Why asking hard questions now is better than asking them five years from now

 With thoughtful questions that encourage couples to examine themselves and their relationships, 9 Essential Conversations before You Say I Do will help couples thrive not only in the early months of their marriage but also in the years to come.

 Includes Guides and Questions.

Nine Essential Conversations before You Say I Do

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