__Friendship is one of the best things ever created.__It is unparalleled as a building block of society, a universal theme in great literature and film, and has a huge impact on our mental health, wellbeing and happiness. But many of us are lonely or feel suffocated by the pressures of life and quantity of relationships we have to maintain. Now, more than ever, we need better, deeper friendships. We need the best of friends.

Full of practical advice, humour and wisdom, Phil Knox shows us how to choose our friends wisely and maintain lasting and meaningful relationships.

Full of practical advice and wisdom, Phil Knox explores how to cherish and celebrate the most important relationships in your life, and be the best friend you can be

'I am proud of my friend for the brilliant book he has written'

'We all need friends, yet friendship is something we rarely think about. This thoughtful and thought-provoking book should help all of us to have richer, deeper and more lasting friendships and to use them to build God's kingdom. Invest time in reading this book: it will be amply repaid!'

'I believe every human is created in God's image and as such deep relationships are hard wired into us and are needed to reflect Him into the world. There is a desperate need in our world to invest in meaningful, sacrificial relationships and Phil has written a book that not only has a compelling argument but makes the process and steps needed to actually build new friendships outside our Christian bubbles, easy and accessible to everyone.'

'As we work to see change in our streets and communities there are few things more important than friendships. They are the relational glue that hold us together. Phil is such a wordsmith and has written a great book full of humour and wisdom that will help us all deepen our friendships and expand our network. It is a ray of hope that explores how we can thrive in our relationships and be the best of friends to those around us. I'm praying it has a huge impact.'

'This book helps us recognise the pressures that friendships face in our culture, yet lifts our vision to the God-given potential of all our friendships. Phil Knox distils valuable insights from academic research and everyday life, combining helpful frameworks with highly practical tips. Most importantly of all, we're brought back to our Creator God, shown how our ordinary friendships are part of God's wonderful design for human beings, and can delight in finding the Best of Friends perfectly fulfilled in Jesus Christ.'

'Now I know why the Quakers have the best name for a denomination: "A Society of Friends." You fall in love, but you make friends. This is a book that is timely, challenging, convicting, . . a barn-stormer of a book that shows us how to "make friends" like Jesus did.'

'Such an important book on a vital issue that's so often overlooked. We are all built for relationship with one another and with the Lord. This book wonderfully highlights the importance of friendship, the need for us to connect well and to prioritise relationships. Get it, read it, and live it. A real book for our times.'

'Phil is the kind of friend he writes about. He carries joy, enthusiasm, encouragement, and faith into every interaction. As he says in the book, this kind of friendship is costly. I'm so grateful he has been generous in friendship to me, and hope this book will be as helpful for every reader as it was for my own heart.'

'Phil has done a great job of writing a book that speaks to us in this present moment. After the forced disconnection of the covid years the content in this book is so relevant and timely. It's well written and made me laugh at times, tear up at times and most of all, appreciate afresh the importance of friendships. Phil encourages and equips us all towards living intentional lives of relational richness. This is a book that needs to be widely read.'

Foreword xv

Acknowledgments xvii

Enterlude xviii

Introduction 1

1 The power of friendship 7

2 The pressure on friendship 19

3 Circles of friends 34

4 One - Jesus had a best friend 45

5 Three - Jesus had an inner circle 70

6 Twelve - Jesus had a huddle 89

7 Seventy-two - Jesus had a network 107

8 Add a zero – Jesus had a following 130

9 × (multiply) - Moses had a mentor . . . and an apprentice 145

10 + (add) - Moses had a God 160

Conclusion 171

Afterword 175

Notes 177

Phil Knox

Foreword

Acknowledgments

Enterlude

Introduction

The power of friendship

The pressure on friendship

Circles of friends

One – Jesus had a best friend

Three – Jesus had an inner circle

Twelve – Jesus had a huddle

Seventy-two – Jesus had a network

Add a zero – Jesus had a following

× (multiply) – Moses had a mentor . . . and an apprentice

+ (add) – Moses had a God

Conclusion

Afterword

Notes

The Evangelical Alliance

Friendship is one of the best things ever created.

It is unparalleled as a building block of society, a universal theme in great literature and film, and has a huge impact on our mental health, wellbeing and happiness. But many of us are lonely or feel suffocated by the pressures of life and quantity of relationships we have to maintain. Now, more than ever, we need better, deeper friendships. We need the best of friends.

Full of practical advice, humour and wisdom, Phil Knox shows us how to choose our friends wisely and maintain lasting and meaningful relationships.

\["For anyone struggling with friendships","Whether you're feeling pressures or absences in friendship, this book offers helpful wisdom","You'll learn to find friendship and how to be a good friend"\]

As we work to see change in our streets and communities there are few things more important than friendships. They are the relational glue that hold us together. Phil is such a wordsmith and has written a great book full of humour and wisdom that will help us all deepen our friendships and expand our network. It is a ray of hope that explores how we can thrive in our relationships and be the best of friends to those around us. I’m praying it has a huge impact.

__- Debra Green, OBE Executive Director, Redeeming Our Communities__

We all need friends, yet friendship is something we rarely think about. This thoughtful and thought-provoking book should help all of us to have richer, deeper and more lasting friendships and to use them to build God’s kingdom. Invest time in reading this book: it will be amply repaid!

__- Revd Canon J John__

I believe every human is created in God's image and as such deep relationships are hard wired into us and are needed to reflect Him into the world. There is a desperate need in our world to invest in meaningful, sacrificial relationships and Phil has written a book that not only has a compelling argument but makes the process and steps needed to actually build new friendships outside our Christian bubbles, easy and accessible to everyone.

__- John Kirkby CBE, Founder Isaiah 61 Movement i61m, Founder of Christians Against Poverty__

This book helps us recognise the pressures that friendships face in our culture, yet lifts our vision to the God-given potential of all our friendships. Phil Knox distils valuable insights from academic research and everyday life, combining helpful frameworks with highly practical tips. Most importantly of all, we’re brought back to our Creator God, shown how our ordinary friendships are part of God’s wonderful design for human beings, and can delight in finding the Best of Friends perfectly fulfilled in Jesus Christ.

__- John Russell, Lead Minister, Cornerstone Church, Nottingham__

Now I know why the Quakers have the best name for a denomination: “A Society of Friends.” You fall in love, but you make friends. This is a book that is timely, challenging, convicting, . . a barn-stormer of a book that shows us how to “make friends” like Jesus did.

__- Leonard Sweet, author, professor, publisher and founder of preachthestory.com__

Such an important book on a vital issue that’s so often overlooked. We are all built for relationship with one another and with the Lord. This book wonderfully highlights the importance of friendship, the need for us to connect well and to prioritise relationships. Get it, read it, and live it. A real book for our times.

__- Gavin Calver, CEO, Evangelical Alliance__

Phil is the kind of friend he writes about. He carries joy, enthusiasm, encouragement, and faith into every interaction. As he says in the book, this kind of friendship is costly. I’m so grateful he has been generous in friendship to me, and hope this book will be as helpful for every reader as it was for my own heart.

__- Canon Sarah Yardley, Mission Lead, Creation Fest UK__

Phil has done a great job of writing a book that speaks to us in this present moment. After the forced disconnection of the covid years the content in this book is so relevant and timely.

It's well written and made me laugh at times, tear up at times and most of all, appreciate afresh the importance of friendships. Phil encourages and equips us all towards living intentional lives of relational richness. This is a book that needs to be widely read.

__- Ness Wilson, Pioneer UK Leader__

This is a book about friendship exploring why this biblical community value is so crucial despite the age of technological and communications advancement that still leaves us isolated. With the fragmentation, disintegration and dislocation of our western world that cherishes individualism, friendships rooted in God and community is a critical counter-cultural worldview. Humanity is relationally wired because our architect, that is, God made us to be like him therefore we long for connection. Phil has given us a template in this book on how we can connect with God so that we can learn how to connect with our world. Christians and non-Christians will find this book valuable.

__- Rev Dr Israel Oluwole Olofinjana, Director, One People Commission, Evangelical Alliance__

More and deeper friendships are the need of the hour. In The Best of Friends Phil Knox brings key insights from the sciences into conversation with the life of Jesus to show how you and I can go beyond mere acquaintanceship to meaningful comradery. A recommended read for these disconnected times.

__- Sheridan Voysey, founder of FriendshipLab.org, presenter of Pause for Thought on BBC Radio 2, and author of The Making of Us.__

Small children are great at making friends, but as adults we've often lost the knack. Phil Knox helps us to consider what friendship is for, and how it works, and why it matters. He helps us to explore Jesus's model of friendship, and see what we can learn from it as we navigate our own relationships. This book will encourage you to be more thankful for the friendships you have, and more intentional about maintaining and developing them.

__- Kate Wharton, Vicar of St Bart’s Roby, author of Single Minded.__

Phil Knox has done us all a huge favour with this thoughtful, easy to read book. Friendships are at the centre of what it means to be human and this book nails why they matter and how they work.

__- Jon Yates Executive Director, Youth Endowment Fund and Author of Fractured__

Loneliness is at an epidemic level today. Even those of us who know lots of people can feel that our relationships aren’t of the quality we’d like. Phil Knox helps us understand these feelings and provides helpful and realistic steps for how we can grow in more satisfying friendships – not only with each other, but also with the living God.

__- Peter Dray Director of Creative Evangelism, UCCF: The Christian Unions__

Phil Knox, the author of Story Bearer, offers wisdom for finding friendship, managing pressures and how to be a friend that blesses in his new book The Best of Friends.

__Phil Knox__ is an evangelist, speaker and missiologist at the Evangelical Alliance. He is passionate about making Jesus known and seeing communities thrive. He loves learning and has degrees in law and mission and evangelism. Phil is married to Dani and they have two sons, Caleb and Jos. He is an avid runner, enthusiastic waterskier and once broke the world record for the longest five-a-side football match. He is also a performance poet and author of Story Bearer. The Best of Friends is his second book.

Best of Friends

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